Mothers Don't Always Win Child Custody. Don't make these mistakes!
Wondering how to win child custody? Try to avoid 5 key mistakes in order to prove you have been the primary caregiver for your children, and that your intentions are completely honorable. Need help collecting admissible evidence for your child custody case? A child custody private investigator can help!
You hear over and over how women are favored in custody battles. However, this is no longer the case. That sentiment has been absorbed as an absolute truth from a time period when most women were home raising children, while fathers worked outside the home. Now, it isn't all that common for fathers to be more of the primary caregivers for their children and statistics show that as many as 50% of fathers who seek primary custody of their children during a divorce win!
If you are a woman who is facing a divorce, or a child custody dispute, take the advice of a seasoned child custody investigator and avoid these five mistakes:
- Losing your cool. It's one thing to calmly present the facts, supported by legally admissible evidence. It's another to lose your cool and start accusing your ex, or the father of your child, of heinous actions or personality traits that sound more like the rantings of an irate high-schooler. Judges hear it all, and they aren't easily swayed by passionate accusations. No matter how hard it is to keep yourself in check, the more calm and collected you are, the more legitimate you, and your side of the case, will appear in court.
- Be a workaholic. If you're a dedicated career woman who works 50-hour work weeks, and is available for work on weekends and holidays, it won't necessarily help your case in court if your partner has been a good parent, and is home more often. The primary caregiver was traditionally the mother, which is one of the reasons mothers used to receive the benefit of the doubt in family law courts. However, times have changed - especially post-recession. If you want to win physical custody of your children, you may need to prioritize home time, over work time, leading up to your child custody case.
- Use texting, emails, and voicemails as reactive verbal weapons.. All those spiteful angry texts, emails, and voice mails can be held against you in a court of law. If you are a reactive person, this is the time to get that personality trait in check. The technological era means most of those records can be saved, printed, recorded, etc. If you're wondering how to win child custody, a text full of expletives or a ranting voicemail is NOT the way to go about it! Don't communicate anything you wouldn't mind having to listen to or have read in front of the judge.
- Drink heavily and use drugs. If you are trying to get custody, you do NOT want the courts to hear you have a substance abuse problem. They take this accusation very seriously. If you do have a substance abuse problem, you need to seek help immediately so you can become a responsible parent for your children. Avoid illegal substances altogether, and avoid associating with others who use them, as this can be held against you in court. Drink only in moderation, and never drive while under the influence.
- Come to court unprepared. If you are concerned about the behavior of the other parent, consider hiring a child custody investigator to help you gather and organize evidence to present in court. This can save you thousands in excess legal fees, and can provide you with court admissible reports and/or professional surveillance videos and photos if necessary. Your family law attorney will have a much better time presenting your case if you have already done your homework.
The more you can do to demonstrate you are calm, mature, and have been the primary caregiver for you children, the more likely you are to win child custody. Good luck to you, and please contact us if we can be of service.
Need a Los Angeles Child Custody Private Investigator?
Mike Garroutte, owner of Linked Investigations, has worked as a licensed Los Angeles Child Custody Private Investigator for three decades. His services are sought after by some of the most powerful family law attorneys in Los Angeles and Orange Counties. Give us a call. 877-464-5374.